aventuras al lado del lago

Meeting with R1 and T1
6/20/09
Keywords: interview, politics, Santiago, civil war

Today I went to Panajachel in hopes of getting some information about the programa nacional del resarcimiento from some anthropologists Director knows. R1 and T1 are an older couple that own a bookstore and cultural center off the main street in Panajachel, and I wasn’t sure what kind of help they could offer me but figured it’d be a good idea to at least try and see if they know some people I could talk to in the next week. I arrived in Pana via lancha at 10:55, and took a tuktuk to the calle principal so I could be at the cultural center on time for my meeting with R1 at 11:00. The Centro Cultural Romero is a small blue building nestled between shops and restaurants on the calle principal across from a fenced-in children’s playground. Upon entering the building around 11:05 I was met by R1, a friendly, balding older man with a slight limp wearing a red tee-shirt and khakis. He invited me to sit down with him at one of the 4 large wooden tables in the main room, and I began asking him about the different programs and services offered by the cultural center. He told me there is no fixed schedule, but that many times they’ll offer seminars and book readings to the community in Panajachel. I commented on the beauty of the building and began to slowly lead into the reason why I had come to speak with him and his wife, T1. I introduced myself as one of Director’s students, and briefly outlined my project for him taking care to highlight the trouble I had finding official information regarding the resarcimiento program. As I spoke, it seemed like I was getting myself into something R1 hadn’t really expected. He furrowed his brow, but was friendly and helpful in his response. He told me neither T1 or he had worked on anything having to do with the civil war in a long time but that they know a few people who could possibly help me. At this point T1 came over to our table and I introduced myself. A pretty older woman with a neat ponytail dressed in jeans and a blue striped button-down shirt, R1 reviewed my project for her and asked her if she knew anything that could help me. T1 pondered for a moment, and replied with the same thing that R1 had told me. They would have been able to help me more a few years ago, but they could at least give me a few ideas as to where to pursue more information. R1 told me of a few human rights organizations in Sololá that would most likely have some official line about the resarcimiento, including ones called Cal DH, Defensoria Indigena and the presidential human rights organization at the muni in the regional governmental seat. He told me he could call me with numbers if he found them, but said the best bet would be to go to the muni in Santiago and to ask for the numbers for these organizations since they’d be able to help me more effectively than the encargado of the program at the muni. He also told me people might be wary of giving me information over the phone since my accent and somewhat limited Spanish gives me away as a gringa, but it wouldn’t hurt to try. I wish I could have someone else call for me!

            After this, the meeting seemed to be growing to a close. A couple came into the center and greeted R1 warmly, and it seemed another appointment was about to begin. I thanked R1 for his time as T1 began speaking with the new arrivals, and R1 invited me to look in the bookstore for some texts that could help me with my study. I found one of the books Director had told me about earlier, but as I didn’t have enough cash to pay for it at the time and the store didn’t accept credit cards I couldn’t buy it. There was a slightly awkward exchanged as I explained that I would need to go and come back in order to buy the book, and I thanked R1 again for his time and help as I walked out the door. I will be sure to go to the muni and ask for the numbers to the organizations he told me about tomorrow.

 The Rain
6/21/09
Journal Note
Keywords: weather, Santiago, overcoming obstacles, journal note

It has been raining nonstop here for four days! And not just drizzling, either. Evil tons of sheetlike water descending faster and faster by the hour, usually starting around 1 PM and continuing intermittently all afternoon and evening. We had to cancel our hike to Sta. Cruz this morning because of it, I was disappointed but also glad to stay in my warm bed for a few more hours. My family woke up around 9 this morning because of the weather, which is unheard of for them. I’m not used to being the first one awake. I guess the rainy season is no joke here, I hope it clears up a little in the next few days if only for my cold and aching bones.

The Requisites Document
6/17/09
Keywords: civil war, Santiago, politics, documents, the muni
I plan on scanning the requisites document that Maynor gave me at the muni within the next few days, but before that I wanted to take a minute to describe it as it strikes me as particularly interesting. A two-page document divided into 8 sections and titled ‘MUNICIPALIDAD DE SANTIAGO ATITLAN, PROGRAMA DE RESARCIMIENTO: ?COMO ACEDER A LOS BENEFICIOS DEL PROGRAMA NACIONAL DE RESARCIMIENTO?’, all the qualifications for each category of program participation are listed under headings describing different sorts of war damages and/or injuries. The 8 kinds of damages that can qualify a person for participation in the program are as follows, and incorporate a broader scope of war crimes than I had initially thought:

-Ejecución Extrajudicial (Extrajudicial Execution)

-Desaparición Forzada (Forced Disappearance)

-Violación Sexual/Violencia Sexual (Sexual Violation/Sexual Violence)

-Tortura Física y Psicológica (Physical and Psychological Torture)

-Desplazamiento Forzado (Forced Displacement)

-Masacre (Massacre)

-Reclutamiento Forzado de Menores (Forced Conscription of Minors)

-Violaciones en Contra de la Niñez (Violations Against Children)

Beneath each heading is included a basic list of documents needed for prospective program participants in order to apply for reparations money. While most of the documents needed are pretty straightforward (birth and death certificates, copies of ID cards) there are a few which seem like they would offer some problems. In particular, one of the requisite documents for those wishing to receive money for violations for forced conscription of minors and for violations against children is a municipal certificate certifying the local government’s acknowledgement that the acts in question occurred. It seems to me that this would be very difficult to obtain for many people, either as a function of the long period of time between the occurrence and enrollment in the program or as a function of the fact that many of the crimes committed during the war are known only to the direct family members of the victims, selected community members close to the families and the victims themselves. As the nature of the war itself was secretive and there don’t seem to be official documents profiling what happened, when, and to whom, I wonder how many people have been able to substantiate their claims and if they haven’t what toll it’s taken on the families and victims themselves. I am glad to at least have a document detailing the requisites at this point, and feel it will help in interviews with those who have applied for the program but haven’t received money in order to check their application materials against the official list. I look forward to writing Maynor Ixbalán for more information and clarification in the next few days.

 Interview with Z1, #1
6/17/09
Keywords: civil war, interview, Santiago, poverty
After our visit to the muni today I returned home and began to write out some field notes while I waited for lunch. After about 20 less than productive minutes, my host sister L1 came running into the room where I was sitting. “She’s here today, she came today! Come have your interview!” L1 said over and over again, and I knew immediately what she was talking about. Since the beginning of my project, L1 and my host mother have been telling me about a very poor woman they know named Z1 who has applied for resarcimiento but has not received it. Her story has become the go-to testimonial for me in referring to those having issues enrolling in the program. Even though I hadn’t met her before today, I’ve heard the story of how she lost her husband in January of 1981 in the same massacre that claimed the life of C1’s husband, and how Z1 was forced into poverty in the aldea of Checkaya in order to work to sustain her 3 children. My host mother told me about how over the years since that day our host family has supported Z1 by giving her the extra corn from my host father’s milpa since Z1 had to sell her husband’s land in order to feed her children. Her 2 sons have had a hard time finding land to farm even in adulthood as a result of their economic situation, and Z1’s daughter has had to resort to living on a coffee plantation under a patron in order to supplement the household’s income. Presently Z1 works as a weaver, and comes to our family’s house once every week to deliver the cloth she makes in order for it to be made into embroidered wallets by my host sister and sold in the market and in Antigua. It has been hard for me to get in touch with Z1 since I’m often out of the house for class when she comes to the house, and L1 and I had discussed my interviewing Z1 this Friday when she was scheduled to come by the house. I guess her plans changed though, and at 11:30 this morning Z1 was waiting in the living room of my family’s house to talk to me about her experiences. As a poor indigenous woman who speaks no Spanish and who has been deeply traumatized by her experiences, Z1 initially was not interested in having an interview with me. L1 and my host mother both had to talk to Z1 in order to let her know about my intentions and the focus of my project, and I am incredibly grateful for their efforts and their influence in letting Z1 know it’s okay to talk to me.

            After introducing myself to Z1 and thanking her profusely for letting me have the opportunity to speak with her, I sat down for our interview in the dark living room with L1 as my translator. I sat on a plastic stool in the middle of the room, facing Z1 and L1 as they sat in armchairs along the wall. Z1 is a 57 year-old Santiago native who looks like she could be 70 because of her beautiful long gray hair, lined face and faded but immaculate blouse and skirt. As I asked her my first question, I was happy to see that she looked as if she understood Spanish; at least one leg of the tedious translating process would be eliminated. And so the interview began. When I asked Z1 to tell me her definition of the programa nacional de resarcimiento, she told me instead about the requisite information she had to hand in; I asked L1 to translate the question again, but was met with the same response. Z1 told me the encargado in the muni had asked her how many years it had been since her husband died, and then asked her for photocopies of her ID and those of her children. Later with futher probing as to the documents required for program enrollment Z1 told me she had given a marriage certificate and a death certificate as well. I moved on to ask Z1 if she had received money through the program and she replied no, that the encargado had interviewed her but she hadn’t received any money. She speculated that maybe her inability to procure money had something to do with the fact that she may not have provided all the necessary documents. I asked if the encargado had given her a list, and Z1 responded no although she says she has checked back many times since enrolling in the program to make sure she had submitted everything necessary. She added that she just didn’t understand what had gone wrong, and repeated this phrase throughout the interview along with the word ‘maho’on’, or ‘nothing’ in Tz’utujil. At this point in the interview I wished wholeheartedly that I spoke Tz’utujil so that I could understand the side conversations that occurred between every question between Z1 and L1; was L1 helping Z1 qualify her answers or providing her with alternative wording for the questions that could somehow change their meaning? Whatever the situation, however, I was grateful for Z1’s time and whatever sort of information I could gain from her regardless of the loss inherent in translation. I asked Z1 to describe how she heard about the resarcimiento program; she told me that after her husband died she had become a patrollera here in Santiago to earn money and to keep the pueblo safe from more violence. 2 years ago in 2007 the encargado for the reparations program at the time (a friend of Z1’s who also acted as a patrollero during the war) told her about the programa nacional de resarcimiento and described it to Z1 as a good opportunity for her to receive some compensation for the loss of her husband 26 years before. But the encargado has changed since then, and every time Z1 goes to inquire about the status of her enrollment she is told to be patient. She told me that the names of those to receive resarcimiento payment are announced on the radio station ‘voz de Atitlán’ every month, and that she has been told to expect her name to be called a number of times over the past year. Each time Z1 listens without fail, but has yet to hear her named called. She told me she doesn’t know what to feel about her situation, just that she has no idea if they will ever give her the money she plans to use as her children’s inheritance. “If my husband were alive, he could work and we would have had a house. My sons would have land and an inheritance, but it can never be that way” L1 interprets for Z1. For my last question, I asked Z1 if she had heard about those who are lying to receive reparations. She told me she’s heard about them, although most of them live far away from her in the center of town. She did tell me there are 3 other women in her aldea who have not been able to get reparations, even though their husbands and sons died the same day as hers and others and they all turned in their paperwork on the same day two years ago. L1 seemed surprised by this, and her and Z1 chatted quietly for a second before lapsing into silence. After a moment, I thanked Z1 again for her time and for speaking with me. She told me to thank God instead, for allowing us to be there. I kissed Z1 on the cheek goodbye, she rounded up her weaving materials and the interview and the visit were over.

 Interview with F1, #1
6/18/09
Keywords: interview, overcoming obstacles, civil war, Santiago, the muni
This afternoon I got back to Santiago just in time to make my 5 PM appointment to interview F1 at La Clinica Rxiin Tzin a Met just off the main plaza. I was anxious to make it to this meeting on time, especially since our last appointment for an interview fell through due to F1’s busy work schedule as a wet nurse. I went into the main office of the light blue clinic building and asked to be taken to F1’s office. A thin, elegant indigenous woman in glasses introduced herself as F1’s daughter in law, and led me past the line of people waiting for medical attention up a set of dim and narrow concrete to the 2^nd floor of the clinic where F1 has her office. I rounded the corner at the top of the stairs and found myself in a large, mostly empty and dimly lit room the size of an average elementary school classroom. There was a blackboard at the head of the room, and in front of it a large wooden table where F1 and one of her work colleagues were seated. As I walked across the dusty wooden floor to join them I heard the rain pounding on the row of windows to my right, and felt like I was in a movie. I greeted F1, and presented myself to her colleague C2 who F1 said would be sitting in on the interview as they were going to keep working after I left. As I introduced my project and the sorts of questions I was planning to ask in our interview, F1 seemed very suspicious. She asked me what direct benefit she would get from our interview, and whether her answering my questions would have any impact on Santiago. I was taken aback, but I told her I planned on giving her and all the other people I’m interviewing a copy of my conclusions as well as presenting a copy of my research to the muni. I reiterated that I would not be using any of her personal information, and she seemed to be calmed by that reassurance. I also let F1 know that if at any point she felt uncomfortable answering the questions I had for her it was more than okay for us to stop. When I thought F1 seemed comfortable, I began. When asked if she could define the programa nacional de resarcimiento in her own words F1 told me it was a type of aid, the government’s minimal recognition of the loss experienced by people who have lost their loved ones in the civil war. She told me shortly that she had received the money, and that it only took 4 months to reach her. I remarked that 4 months seemed very fast, and F1 told me she had friends at the municipality who had helped her. I asked about the requisites for the program, what they were and how the process of applying usually went. F1 responded only by saying there were many requirements, and she didn’t remember. She does not know that when the government began the reparations program, only that she heard about it from her friend the encargado at the muni. F1 also had not heard anything about the fact that some people are lying to receive reparations money. She did tell me that one disadvantage of the program is that they give the same relatively small amount of money to everyone who qualifies for it; F1 says it was difficult to make 24,000Q last in her own household of 4 people, but many households are larger and have more trouble dividing the money without fighting. I asked what she thought about those who have applied for the program but have not received their money, and F1 told me she had heard about that but nothing more. While I was a little frustrated with the brevity and seeming unavailability of her responses, I could tell my interview with F1 was over at that point. I asked her if she knew of anyone else I could talk to, and after talking in Tz’utujil with her friend C2 told me that if I left my phone number she could call me with names if she thought of them. I thanked her, and offered to do any household favors she needed since we’re neighbors for the next 3 weeks. I’m not sure I’ll be able to get in touch with F1 again, and even if I did I’m not sure how much information I’d be able to get.

Interview With F1, #1
Journal Note
6/19/09
Keywords: interview, civil war, journal note, Santiago, overcoming obstacles
This morning over breakfast of mosh and banana in the small kitchen of my host family’s house I had a long chat with my host mother M1. As both of us started to wake up a little more and get ready for the day ahead, she asked me how my work was going. I told her it was going pretty well, I just needed to find more people to interview. I told her I wasn’t sure what I was going to do today since my appointment in Pana fell through, that maybe I would do some writing and try and work on my assignments. M1 asked me if I had interviewed F1 yet, since she’s our family’s neighbor and M1 has known her since they were small children. I told her about our interview yesterday, about how I hadn’t gotten too much information and it seemed like F1 really didn’t want to tell me anything other than the basic details of her experience in the resarcimiento program. M1 was surprised. “She didn’t tell you about her husband?”I shook my head no, and she sighed. “Si pues, it’s very hard for her to tell the story. See, he disappeared.” She told me about the day early in the 1980s when F1 had gone to take her husband breakfast and found his room empty, the crying and mourning that went on down the street for weeks after he didn’t return to the house. M1 told me F1’s husband was a guerrilla, that someone had found out and probably told the army. F1 still doesn’t know what happened to her husband, whether he was burned or shot. “They still don’t know where his body is, they probably never will.” I expressed my surprise and regret, and M1 went on to describe the dark days of the war. She told me those days someone disappeared or was killed every day. “There was a lot of sadness, and so much fear everywhere”, M1 said. She told me the day of the first massacre (Jan. 7, 1981) many people were so afraid they chose to go sleep in the Catholic church instead of in their houses. M1 and her family slept in their neighbor’s house for almost a week after that first tragedy. L2 came in after that, and the two of them discussed for a second. L2 told me there is a set of Catholic sisters they know whose husbands had helped the guerrillas for a long time. Sometime in 1982 these husband decided the best action to take to keep their families safe due to the increase in military violence would be for them to disappear on their own. They ran away early one morning to Antigua, found a house and hid there. However, ‘saber who heard, who found out’ M1 said. The military found out where they had been hiding, rounded up the men in Antigua and brought them back to Santiago to be burned as an example.

            Every time I start to feel some frustration or bitterness with the lack of information I’m receiving from certain interviewees, someone brings the situation back into focus for me. Most of the people I have spoken with have suffered through immense tragedies that have left indelible and echoing scars on their daily lives. Why should I expect or demand information from them about their pain? If they share what they’ve gone through, it should be 100% voluntary and an honor for me to listen. My questions don’t probe on that level and shouldn’t anyways. I am very glad for M1 and my conversation today for putting things into perspective, and am going to try my best to keep my priorities in order in my mind.

 Better Days
6/19/09
Journal Note
Keywords: obstacles, overcoming obstacles, Santiago, journal note
The past few days have improved considerably over Sunday and Monday from this past week, for which I am incredibly grateful. There are still times when I get really depressed and I’m still more likely to cry at the drop of a hat when I think about home or my uncle David, but for the most part I’ve found staying productive and making sure to leave myself an hour or two at the end of the day to read a book or watch a movie before I go to sleep. The unexpected availability of the mayor on Tuesday and the surprise interview with Z1 came at exactly the right time, and reminded me that I’m capable of making each day as productive as humanly possible. I can honestly say this is the first time that doing academic work has afforded me some comfort and escape when I’m low, and so far I prefer channeling my emotions into my work to channeling them into a night at the bar or sitting around by myself thinking about things too much. I’m more grateful than ever before for the kindness and warmth of my host family and the fact that I can laugh with them; in a strange way, they remind me of my family at home. Meaghan’s presence here has also been invaluable, and our escapes out to sit and talk or to buy entirely too many unhealthy American snacks have helped me remember that in addition to working my butt off here I should also be having fun once in a while. After all I get my assignments done, am working fairly steadily (most days) on my study and we’re in the most beautiful place I’ve ever seen. I think Director and Directora are more than right to warn incoming field school participants about the ‘dark days’ they’ll have while down here, especially around the 3^rd week. I’m just happy those bad days are offset by good ones, or else I’d probably be going crazy.

 Project Check-in
Methods Note
6/19/09
Keywords: Methods, civil war, Santiago, final paper
Yesterday morning in class in San Pedro we used our time to systematically pick our projects apart in order to get an informed idea of how to proceed. In our small group of 5 we took turns going around the table and stating the purpose of our study in 2 sentences each. After somebody gave their 2 sentences, another classmate was asked to repeat it back to them, and yet another attempted to sum up the main idea in their own words. This seemed like a really tedious idea, but while it was difficult it helped a lot to hear our own ideas echoed back to us so we could figure out what’s working and what needs more clarification or focus. When my turn came I stated that the purpose of my study is to explore and define the effects of the national reparations program on community in Santiago Atitlán. As my classmates tried to repeat my purpose back to me and after I spent about 5 minutes describing the information I’ve gotten and the different types of focuses I could take to continue, Director turned to me and said: “it seems like everyone else has a better idea of what you’re doing than you do”. This rattled me a little, and the more I thought about it the more it seemed like that really is the case. My classmates told me it seems like I’m so immersed in the amount of information I’m getting that it’s become difficult to pull back and look at it as a whole. I got some really valuable suggestions and clarification on my ideas throughout the whole ordeal, and think I have a much better idea of how to shape my final assessment of the information I’ve been gathering. My classmates helped me see the difference and separate importance of taking both an etic and emic perspective in describing the effectiveness and the effects of the resarcimiento program here in Santiago.

            In evaluating the effectiveness of the program I will be able to focus purely on the facts; the 36 women statistic that was given to me by the encargado in the muni, the requisite documents for enrollment, the intricacies of the program and its purpose. I have found this information mostly through speaking with officials at the muni and by browsing online. The effect of the program focuses in more on the individual experiences and frustrations within its participants who I am interviewing, and will be the main source for the ethnography and emotion in my study. I think keeping these things disentangled for the majority of my time here will allow me to link the effectiveness and the effect of the program in a causal relationship and to keep my information clearly sorted for analysis.

Quagmire
6/15/09
Journal Note
Keywords: obstacles, interviews, cultural differences, Santiago, civil war, journal
Yesterday was terrible. After I talked to my father and found out about my uncle passing away, I started crying and really didn’t stop until I fell asleep around 2 PM. I was planning on staying in the house and reading that night, and then probably writing a very long journal note and falling asleep again. My host family persuaded me to eat lunch, but I wasn’t hungry. When I woke up, a classmate called to see if I wanted to go to La Posada and have a drink with her to talk. I hesitated, but figured it’d maybe be a good idea to get out of the house since I hadn’t really done anything but wallow all day. I figured we could go, have one drink, maybe eat some food, and be back by 7:30 PM. But one drink eventually turned into more than I meant to have, and even though I made sure to get in touch with my family to let them know what was going on I still feel terrible about how the night ended up. I didn’t feel drunk, I just felt numb but I know I was acting out of character and regret that I returned to my house at 10 PM instead of at 7:30. Especially after my host family was so kind and supportive of me earlier in the day, I feel like I took advantage of their hospitality and love in order to try and process my emotions in a really unhealthy way. Given, I was in by 10 instead of later and I know I didn’t do anything stupid because I remember everything. I just feel even sadder now, and blocked up in terms of my writing and my project in general. I’m running out of new contacts, I got blown off the other day, and I’m starting to think my population of contacts is overly narrow. These things combined with the death of my uncle, a wicked hangover and the rapidly increasing sentiment that I’m in over my head have produced one hell of a bad mood. I keep trying to rationalize my behavior and pull myself out of this slump because my modus operandi is so heavily dependent on some sort of underlying optimism and drive to make this work, and I think I can do it in the next few days if I just put my head down and work but it seems harder than ever before. I can’t help but think that if I had gotten the news about my uncle earlier or much later in the program it would be easier to work through, but it’s week 4 and I know if this hadn’t happened I’d be stressed out of my gourd anyways so it’s difficult to find a silver lining. I KNOW I can pull this off, I’m just having trouble figuring out what direction I should choose to plunge ahead. Sometimes this program seems really long, and I kind of wish I were at home.

Things I Have Done, Things I Have Left to Do
6/16/09
See also: We’re off to See the Muni, 6/17/09
Keywords: To-do list, Santiago, civil war, obstacles, overcoming obstacles
In trying to regain my lost project momentum, I thought it would be helpful to make a list of information I have so far and a list of information I need to attain somehow in the next few weeks. I have the time budget listed on my project outline, but it has not been very helpful and I feel I need a list of goals that’s a little more concrete in order to forge ahead.

Things I Have Done

4 interviews-C1, L1, Y1, J10

2 more anticipated interviews

2 anticipated contacts

initial systematic observation at Parque de Paz

Assignments 1-5

Initial photos for Assignment 10

Field notes up to date

Some research on gob.gt site

Planned meeting with J10 to go over resarcimiento documentation

To Do

Find non-evangelical contacts

Find contacts who have not received resarcimiento

Find contacts who have lied/help with the lying process

Talk to someone at the muni about the mayor’s proposed project to supplement the resarcimiento (See ‘We’re off to See the Muni’, 6/17/09)

2^nd interviews with prior contacts (GET DEMOGRAPHIC INFO)

2^nd systematic observation at Parque de Paz, hopefully with company

Lit review for Silence on the Mountain

Assignments 6-9

Finish Assignment 10

Begin/sustain field note analysis in anticipation of final paper

 We’re off to see the Muni
6/17/09
Keywords: interview, Santiago, politics, civil war, the muni
This morning Meaghan and I went for a walk early in the morning around some of Santiago that we’d never seen, just to clear our minds and get ready for the rest of the day. We decided today was as good a day as any to deliver the book of last year’s projects to the municipalidad, and set out around 8:45 for the mayor’s office to see if we could meet with him and introduce ourselves formally as researchers in the area. Honestly I didn’t have high hopes for getting an audience with the mayor, since from what I’ve heard he’s hard to get a hold of and also the muni seems to be incredibly crowded every time I walk past it. This particular morning it wasn’t too busy though, and when we stopped in at the reception office to see if we could meet with the mayor for a few minutes his secretary told us to sit and wait for his meeting to be over. As we sat in bright plastic chairs outside of the reception office on the 2^nd floor of the teal municipal building looking out over the quickly graying sky and the orange flowers growing through the clay tiles on the roof, I wondered what this man I had heard so many mixed reactions to would actually be like. Manuel Reanda has been a polarizing topic of conversation since day 1 in Santiago as a result of his actions to limit the availability of loans to people in town as well as his public works projects to renovate the park near the market and to build one near the docks, and most allusions to corrupt politicians made by those I’ve interviewed have included the mayor and his cohort in their scathing scope. I can attribute some of these comments to the general antipathy and vitriol most people seem to have for local politicians, but it has struck me as strange that no one seems to have a wholly or even mostly positive reaction to Reanda. After about 20 minute of waiting, we saw a stream of people filter out of the mayor’s office. The meeting was over, and we were instructed by the secretary inside the reception office to move down to two more chairs directly outside his office and to wait for the mayor to call us in. 5 minutes later a short, powerfully built man of about 40 came out and ushered us in. Dressed in traje with a deep red button down shirt on with long shiny dark hair and the beginning of deep worry lines in his face, Reanda looked the part of an official who is used to straddling the various Santiago conflicts between indigenous interests and economic development that I’ve heard so much about. After shaking hands, he invited us to sit down in two more brightly colored plastic chairs and we began taking turns explaining why we’re here in town and what we had come to do. The mayor seemed interested in the fact that we were there to do research, and accepted the book of last year’s projects graciously even though he seemed dismayed that the writing was all in English. He went on to ask us what our own projects are about, and as Meaghan and I explained what we’re working on it seemed that he slipped more and more into his official capacity as representative of all things Santiago. He responded to our project introductions by wishing us good luck, and gave each of us his business card and told us to get in touch with him via email or phone anytime we had any questions. He also encouraged both of us to let him know how the research ends up and about any conflict we end up uncovering that would concern the muni and its operations within the community.

            After receiving the business card it seemed our audience was unofficially over, but as he made to come out from behind his desk to show us out I asked him if I could ask a few questions about the programa nacional de resarcimiento and its status here in Santiago. He nodded, and I went on to ask about what I had heard a few days ago regarding the mayor’s own initiative to add to the effectiveness of the program by giving out a total of 86,000Q. He furrowed his brow and referred me downstairs to the official municipal encargado for the programa nacional here in Santiago, Maynor Ixbalán. “He can answer all your questions about the resarcimiento”, Reanda told me. I thanked him, and as we rose to exit his office he told us he hoped to see us again before we left to go home. We told him we’d be in touch, and made our way downstairs.

Leaving Meaghan in the lobby of the main muni office, I asked if I could talk to M. Ixbalán for a minute and was ushered down a hallway to a small office lined with chairs and a computer desk on one end. The man sitting behind the desk smiled and introduced himself as Maynor and invited me to sit down. While I waited for him to finish talking to the small indigenous woman sitting next to me, I observed Maynor and his working environment. On the wall behind his computer desk there were a number of signs, one in duplicate that said that all trámite of resarcimiento is personal. I thought back to what I have heard in multiple interiews at this point regarding the conditions for transport of reparation documents to the capitol; with so much fraud and so many people taking advantage of the fact that trámite is personal by electing to charge people for their services, I wondered why the muni didn’t make it their business to collect the paperwork and send it themselves. I noticed a number of older indigenous women streaming into the office as I waited, and wondered about their struggles and what stage of the resarcimiento program they were in, if at all. After about 10 minutes Maynor said goodbye to the woman he was talking with and turned his attention to me.

A tall indigenous man dressed in a green striped polo shirt and jeans, he has the slightly weary look of someone used to working in a bureaucratic setting. He was friendly, though, and asked me what I needed his help for. I introduced myself and my project, and started by asking general questions about the program and its function here in Santiago. I asked him if there was any sort of official document describing the resarcimiento program and its requisites, since perusal of the government website hadn’t yielded any results so far. Maynor replied that no, there is really no place to go to find an official outline of any kind about the program and that usually he just tells people that come into the office what they need to submit on a case by case basis. He went on to qualify his statement by explaining that he is the local encargado for the program, but that the program headquarters are in Guatemala City and that the regional workers associated with it were located in Sololá. He did offer to print out a copy of the requisites for me so I could look over them. I thanked him, and asked him about the trámite sign behind his desk. “Is it free for program participants to submit their paperwork?” Maynor responded that yes, if the participants submit their applications and documents at the muni itself it is free. I told him I had heard about other people who charged participants to send their documents, and asked what he thought about that. He told me that it does occur, but the muni has nothing to do with it and it’s up to the individual to decide how to submit their requisite information. There was a lull in the conversation as Maynor said hello to one of the women walking in through the door. After that, he turned to me and told me that so far there have been 36 women total here in Santiago who have received 24,000Q through the program. I asked him about others who had received partial amounts or who had applied for money and haven’t received it yet, but he told me he didn’t know those numbers. I would have pried further, but the number of women waiting to speak with Maynor at that point was fairly large and I felt guilty for occupying time he could otherwise be spending talking with them. He gave me the printout he had made for me of the program’s requisites after stamping the 2^nd page with the official Santiago municipal government seal. As his email address and phone number were listed at the end of the document, I asked if it would be alright for me to send him an email with more questions in the next few days since I knew he had other things to do at the moment. He told me that was fine, and we said goodbye to each other.

Meeting with J10
6/7/09
Keywords: interviews, civil war, Panajachel, Santiago, Santa Lucia, obstacles

Yesterday I went into Panajachel to speak with J10, a friend of Directora’s who I was very interested to talk to regarding his knowledge about the civil war and the resarcimiento. The lancha from Santiago arrived late, of course, and as I hastily flagged down a tuktuk to take me to the hotel J10 and I would be meeting at I thought about what I’d talk to him about. Was this an interview or just a brain picking session? I was a little nervous to present my topic to someone who already undoubtedly knows much more about the war and its effects than I do at this point. But after I arrived at the hotel Posada de Don Rodrigo in Pana and began speaking with J10 I realized that Directora had put me in touch with an invaluable resource in terms of finding a person well-versed in the war’s effects on people in the Lake Atitlán area in addition to the politics surrounding the Programa Nacional de Resarcimiento. We talked for well over an hour, him asking me questions about why I was interested in studying the resarcimiento and me listening to J10’s personal experience with losing his family members in the massacre in Santa Lucía. He showed me pictures of an event he helped set up through the organization ‘Voices Breaking the Silence’ in Santa Lucia, and explained that he had helped the affected women there in his home town to speak up and tell their stories in order to stop being afraid. The testimonials of each woman in attendance were typed up, signed as a historical document and sent to the government as official record of what happened to the community of Santa Lucia during the war. A UN representative was present, as well as a representative for the yet to be formed Programa Nacional de Resarcimiento. As a result of Julio and his partners’ efforts all but 3 of the women in his hometown have received their resarcimiento money and also have a copy of their official testimonial for themselves to reaffirm that they have broken their silence and are not afraid. In each of the pictures J10 showed me, he pointed out a woman and told her story. One, named doña Nicolasa, lost her son in 1980 when the army forced their way into her house and kidnapped him against his will. Because doña Nicolasa opened the door when the army knocked, she felt responsible for the death of her son and always carried a feeling of blame and grief with her. J10 explained that for her, the 2002 testimonial meeting was especially important because it enabled her to receive her resarcimiento and to free herself from her blame. “That’s the most important benefit of the programa nacional”, Julio said. That a small acknowledgment of someone’s pain could help them understand that they weren’t to blame for what happened to their loved one(s) is the most the money can do. But as J10 sees it, there are far more disadvantages than advantages involved in the resarcimiento program. “It’s not just in its quantity or in the way the government gives it”, J10 says. He told me that many families upon receiving their 24000 or 28000Q become divided and angry and can’t agree on a way to split the money. He told me stories of daughters ganging up on mothers in indignant anger after having received only a small portion of the resarcimiento money, and marveled to me that the government hadn’t made any provisions for this sort of conflict while they were drafting the program’s guidelines.

            I read J10 my interview questions in hopes that he would have some input, and received 3 new prospective questions that I intend to add to my list:

-?Si ha recibido el resarcimiento, que hizo con el dinero?

-?Ha tenido algun problema administrar el dinero?

-?Ya se siente recompensada de ese dinero?

The questions stemmed from J10’s own experience and knowledge of families’ different problems with and uses for their reparations money. One family he knows in Santa Lucia used their money to build a store on the front of their house, so they could enjoy an ongoing and productive source of income. But most, he says, spend the money too quickly to enjoy any long term benefit from it. “The programa nacional (de resarcimiento) is like a comet”, J10 says. “It arrives bright like a flash, and is gone just as fast.”
I’m fairly sure I’ll be calling J10 a lot in the next four weeks.

Nightlife in Panajachel
6/7/09
Keywords: cultural differences, Panajachel, observation
On Saturday night a few classmates and I stayed in Panajachel before our trip to Antigua. As afternoon faded into night and we moved from one restaurant to another bar and on forward into multiple conversations paired with just as many bottles of wine, I began to notice a pattern in terms of who frequents what sort of establishment along Santander Street. That afternoon the café we sat in for a few hours seemed to attract exclusively American students with notebooks and pens in tow. Maybe it was the James Taylor playing over the sound system or the advertisements for tofu on the signage, I’m not sure. In most of the bars with live music there seem to only be an assortment of American and European hippies wearing uniforms of flowing shirts, tight pants or short shorts accompanied by long hair tied down with a string. Most of these sort preferred to congregate in vast numbers around absurdly tiny tables in clown car proportions, and seemed to flit from bar to bar in the amount of time it took our group to finish one drink. In the restaurant we went to for dinner I noticed a calmer mix of what appeared to be Guatemalans and American couples out for a quiet meal, accompanied by live music on guitar and bongo drums that served as an excellent and vast contrast to the thumping bass of the club where we ended our night some hours later. It was more than a little jarring to leave the fresh night air only to be sucked into a chaos of sweaty bodies, Motley Crue videos on repeat on the televisions, strobe lights flashing and the latest reggaeton pumping at maximum over strained speakers. The crowd inside the dance club was comprised almost exclusively of Guatemalan teenage couples, and it was surreal to realize I was probably the palest (and one of the tallest) people in attendance. We tried to dance for 10 minutes, but found our arms pinned at our sides and our clothes drenched with other people’s sweat and so made our way outside and to our hostel to collapse for the night. I’m amazed at the level of variety in terms of the nightlife in Pana, and especially at the fact that there seem to be a great number of locals out on Santander among the ever-present tourists. Maybe the dance club was an anomaly? It certainly was the only place I saw anyone resembling a young local Guatemalan out and about that night. 

Antigua
Journal Note
6/7/09
Unfortunately a great deal of my time in Antigua was either spent in the bathroom or in bed watching TV as a result of my being sick and generally exhausted. I have tried to go back and fill in what important events and experiences did occur, as I made it out one night and also one day to explore downtown. I have dated the field notes I have written retrospectively about Antigua with the dates we were actually there to make things flow more easily, I’m sorry for the lack of information.

How to Get Vendors to Stop Trying to Sell You Things
Journal Note
6/12/09
Keywords: Tourism, overcoming obstacles, gringos, economy, journal note
Ever since approximately the 2^nd day we’ve been here in Guatemala I have been trying to devise a way to kindly and respectfully repel all the vendors of varying genders, shapes and sizes who routinely swarm upon anyone vaguely foreign with the voracity of vultures who have circled long enough around their prey to work up a hearty appetite and an equally substantial amount of determination. The attention from bevies of small children and indigenous women wielding armfuls of típica at ‘buen precio’ is understandable to me as a viable means of economic solvency but has also grown so profoundly annoying at this point that I would not be at all surprised to wake up and find someone in bed beside me trying to sell me oven mitts, huipiles or handmade bracelets for a quetzal. At this point I have heard and tried many deflecting phrases, about 1% of which seem to effectively stop the onslaught of salesmanship. The avoidance of eye contact tactic seems to be the one utilized most often among students of the program, but as I have a terrible habit of talking to EVERYONE and can’t help but look at people when they wave things in my face I knew I had to come up with a different method if I was going to survive another day here. The process was not easy, but after days of thought I believe I have come up with a surefire vendor letdown tactic. If I tell them I live here and I’m not going to buy anything until the day before I leave, they leave me alone! Maybe it’s the assertion of sense of place within the community that does it, or the implied promise inherent in the word ‘until’. All I know is that my average vendor interaction time over the past few days has dropped from 10 minutes to about 30 seconds, and you cannot argue with results. Of course now that I’ve written about it, the next vendor I talk to will probably follow me around for a half hour or until I cave in and buy something I really don’t need, but I guess we’ll wait and see what happens.

El Gripe
6/12/09
Keywords: Sick, cultural differences, Santiago
Over the past few days and during our time in Antigua I noticed a growing number of people coming down with cold and sinus infection-like symptoms without any evident explanation. L1 and L2 both have been coughing and sneezing as well, and L1 told me today that this time of year is the time when most people get ‘el gripe’, or colds. This strikes me as interesting, since it’s the warmer and sunnier season here and I tend to associate cold and flu with the winter in the US. Maybe the rain this time of year affects the spread of the cold? I’ve seen news of a Guatemalan flu epidemic in the papers too, but when I visited the doctor the other day she told Director and I that the epidemic is a false alarm meant to draw the people’s attention away from the government’s ordeal in Guatemala City. I was reminded of the US media immediately.

Evangelicals Can Still Joke About Drinking
6/12/09
Keywords: Religion, Cultural differences, Santiago
When I first got to my host family’s house, I was very cautious about revealing certain aspects of my life at home to my host sisters and parents because of sensitivity to their religion and lifestyle. I had learned that evangelical indigenous people were especially conservative about issues regarding alcohol as alcoholism has been rampant in highland communities in the past and evangelism has served as an ordering force in the community in regards to any sort of perceived vice or temptation. Because of these things, I was very surprised that L2’s first question upon my return to Santiago yesterday was an incredibly conspiratorial ‘did you drink lots of beers?’ I was so surprised that I told her the first and most direct answer that came to mind, which was that I hadn’t drank lots of beers because I was sick but that I had wanted to since it was my vacation. L2 laughed, and said at least I would have been drinking beers and not the locally made liquor that makes everybody’s breath smell bad. There has also been an incredible amount of openness in my host family in terms of other cultural differences such as my tattoos, which my host sisters actually like and comment on fairly frequently.

The Calmest Cows
6/4/09
Keywords: animals, cultural differences, San Lucas
Riding into San Lucas today for class, our pickup bore up on a large number of cows and their owner walking slowly through the street. As the pickup swerved to the right to allow the cows to pass, none of them appeared to be scared or put out by the presence of a swiftly moving alien vehicle with lots of people in the back. The cows’ owner just called to them softly and they moved, gradually and peacefully, out of the way of the truck. All my experiences with cows back home have made me think they’ll freak out and run at the slightest provocation. Maybe the cows here are used to walking in the street and seeing cars.

Pickups in the Rain
6/4/09
Keywords: Transportation, cultural differences
On the pickup ride back to Santiago from San Lucas today, a number of classmates and I experienced something new and not altogether pleasant. About halfway through our cramped, standing-room only ride it began to rain. All during class we had watched the storm clouds roll in over the lake, and we had been crossing our fingers in vain for the first half of the pickup ride hoping for a light drizzle instead of the ensuing downpour. As all of us struggled to get out our raingear, the driver pulled over to the side of the road and before we knew it the whole truck bed was covered with a blue plastic tarp. Although this protective measure did serve to keep us dry, it also forced us to crouch in an even more cramped position than we had been standing in and clutch the truck liner for dear life as we rolled around as if inside of a wave. When we finally got into downtown Santiago we rolled the tarp back and gasped at the fresh air like we had been underwater for 20 minutes. I almost would have preferred not to have any rain protection at all.

Frustration
Journal Note
6/5/09
Keywords: overcoming obstacles, journal note, interviews, observation, cultural differences
Yesterday at class in San Lucas when we found out we didn’t have to go to class today, I immediately began mapping out the huge amount of work I’d be able to get done. A whole Friday to ourselves! Another day to work on the project outline and to do research! I was so excited. I slept like a baby last night in anticipation of a full and satisfying day, and woke up to a cool and beautiful morning here in Santiago. I had breakfast, got dressed, got my things together and even convinced myself I’d be able to march into the municipal building and actually find Y1 in her office! I left the house, marched up the main road full of purpose and energy, and within 20 minutes of leaving the house realize the following:
-the power is out in over half of Santiago, including in all of the internet cafes I know of
-Not only is Y1 not in her office, she’s not picking up the phone and there’s a line a half a block long winding out of the muni building
-the post office is closed
After realizing these things, I decided to go looking for a part of the town where there may be power and therefore internet. Instead of finding the internet, I found myself lost in a part of Santiago I’d never been in with no landmarks to guide me except for the San Pedro volcano. I emerged by the dock eventually, and had to climb the dumb hill to get back up the market where I was heckled and jostled and whistled at until I shoved my way through and went home. I know I can still get SOME things done today, but there’s no power here so my computer is going to die in a few minutes and I’ve done all I can with my outline until I can get on the internet and research the official government line on resarcimiento. Why is it that on the one day I have to myself to work, I can’t seem to get in touch with ANYBODY or get to a place where I can actually GET WORK DONE?? I really just want to go see a movie, but I don’t think there are movie theaters anywhere around the lake and we’re not supposed to go in to Pana anyways. Shitteree.

Power Outage
6/5/09
Keywords: Santiago, cultural differences
The power has been out in Santiago since about 10 this morning, and no one knows when it will come back on. L1 told me that the market was lit by candles this morning. I asked if this happens often, and L1 told me that many times the ‘voz de Atitlán’ on the radio announces when there’s going to be a power outage but that most people don’t listen to that radio station so most of the people generally are caught by surprise by the outages.
Power Outage
Journal Note
6/5/09
Keywords: Santiago, cultural differences, journal note
As soon as I found out about the power being out today my thoughts immediately turned towards freshness. “How are people going to keep their refrigerated goods refrigerated?! Everything’s going to melt!!” My brain swam with images of warm sodas and melting ice cream. Then, after a while I realized something strange. I NEVER worry about things like this during power outages in the US. Usually when the power’s out at home I just light some candles, curl up with a book on the couch and wait for the lights to come back on. I wonder why I had such a different reaction here? Maybe it’s because everything just feels a little less secure and I’m not sure how the infrastructure works? There are definitely power lines here, where’s the transformer? It’s strange to worry about things here that I don’t give a second thought to in the States.

The Mayor
6/5/09
Keywords: Santiago, politics
Over the past two weeks, the mayor of Santiago has made appearances in a very large number of my conversations; both with classmates and with interviewees, the subject of ‘how the mayor’s doing’ seems to be incredibly important. From what I’ve gathered so far, the people of Santiago are happy with some of his efforts and incredibly angry with him about others. Positive actions include initiatives to clean trash off the streets and to build a new park by the dock. Less favorable are his attempts to raise taxes, to crack down on small business loans within the community and to renovate the already-renovated park near the market. My host family has commented a number of times on what a fool the mayor is, and they tell me that many of his efforts are a waste of time and money that could be spent on things the town really needs. To me, what the town really needs remains to be seen but it seems a shame to me that the leadership in the muni is letting people down.

The Crazy White People in Santiago
5/28/09
Keywords: Santiago, gringos
Over the past few days I have seen a few older white men around town who my host family tells me have lived here since the 1970s. J1 and M4 and I talked to one of them at the market, he originally hails from Nebraska and has lived here in Santiago since 1975 selling avocado trees that he grows at his house. He asked us our names bud didn’t respond when we asked him his, and asked us to go to coffee with him next week. There is also another older man who I have seen wandering around the streets talking to himself over the past day or two. Today he was sitting at the Pescador restaurant near my host family’s house drinking wine and mumbling. The two men look like they could be brothers.

Diminishing Tuktuk Offers
5/28/09
Keywords: Transportation, Assimilation
As I have walked around the past few days I have noticed that the number of tuktuks that stop and ask me if I need a ride has diminished significantly. The first 2 days I was here I couldn’t walk more than 2 or 3 blocks without being offered a ride, and now I can make it considerably further. More people are also saying hello to me on the street.

Funeral in Chichicastenango
5/31/09
Keywords: death, Chichicastenango, tradition
While sitting in a café in Chichicastenango drinking a beer shortly before returning to Panajachel, I peered out into the throng in the market street outside and began to see people walking by carrying huge bouquets of flowers. As person after person walked by with their faces masked by gently waving sprigs of baby’s breath and long-stemmed roses, I remarked to my friends how beautiful and strange it was to see such delicate flowers weaving their way through the hot-pink, blue and green woven chaos of the market stalls. As my friends turned to see what I was talking about, the people carrying flowers disappeared into the crowd followed by people holding something different; a coffin, brown and somber as its bearers among the raucous and enterprising environment of the street. The contrast between the funerary procession and the enveloping entrepreneurial environment could not have been more distinct; none of the raucous price-calling or tourist laughter was extinguished or even dimmed by the sight of tear-streaked faces and the sure symbol of death moving through the crowd.
Funeral in Chichicastenango
Journal Note
5/31/09
Keywords: death, journal note, Chichicastenango, tradition
I don’t know quite what to make of the fact that we saw a funeral procession in Chichicastenango yesterday. At first impulse it feels almost fundamentally incorrect to have seen such a sorrowful process occurring in what, for me, seems to be a very selfish place; vendors hawk their goods however possible to bring in income for themselves, and consumers (mostly gringos) looking for the perfect souvenir for their trip but that’s about it. But the more I think about it, the more I can’t find any fundamental wrongness in the situation. Maybe it’s the lack of sense of occasion that rattled me a little bit and made our table in the café go silent for a few minutes, but who is to say that life and death can’t exist in the same street on the same day? It is kind of poignant to think of people trying to make a living in the exact same space that a family is moving to lay a life to rest.

Anticipating the first Interview
6/1/09
Keywords: Santiago, interviews, language
This morning at breakfast I asked L1 how to go about speaking to some of the contacts she had told me about last week. More than anything I just wanted to ask about what was culturally appropriate in terms of approaching a relative or complete stranger to talk about civil war reparations so that I can fashion my main interview questions and guide my contacts into feeling better about talking to me. L1, L2 and M1 all told me the best way to go about Doña F1 is to either go meet her at work (unanticipated) at 5 PM when she gets off or to sit on her doorstep and wait for her to come home. After asking if I should start talking to Doña F about the war immediately or make a date to do so later, M1 told me it’d worked for prior students to just start in on a topic right off instead of making a date as many times contacts will renege on arrangements to meet another day. I’m not sure how I feel about waiting on a contact outside her work or house without prior notice, though.

Cracking the C1 Code!
6/1/09
Keywords: Santiago, interviews, overcoming obstacles
One of the contacts that my family told me about is a relative I have met a few times. Every time we speak, it seems like she would much rather be doing something else and after a few interactions I assumed that she wouldn’t want to talk to me. This upset me as I had heard many times about the wealth of information this contact (C1) would provide me about the reparations system and was uncertain I could make friends with her. But this morning, I had a knock on my door. L1 had come to tell me that C1 was coming over and that I should go and talk to her. I told L1 I was unsure, but that I would try again. And whether it was because L1 or M1 had said something to C1 or because C1 herself had been worn down by my feeble attempts at friendship (the first scenario is more likely, while I would far and away prefer to believe the 2^nd), C1 and I had a conversation today. Not only was she nicer and more open than I had seen her before-she answered my questions with a smile, and asked me questions back-she also asked me about my project, and said she would love to meet with me tomorrow after class to have a first interview. I am almost sure someone in my host family must have said something to her to get her to open up to me, but I’m not sure at all that it matters! I am looking forward to our interview and need to make sure I have my questions written out right so I don’t waste the opportunity. I wonder if I should bring a gift?Cracking the C1 Code!
Journal Note
6/1/09
Keywords: Santiago, interviews, overcoming obstacles, journal note
I have thought a lot about why C1 has been so reticent with me (at least up until today). Barring the notion that she may just be shy or tired or cranky when I see her, I have heard a lot about how she is a somewhat important person in the community, so maybe she felt talking to me wasn’t any sort of priority or option regardless of my living with her extended family. Another option I thought of, though, was that she had heard about my project and was less than enthused. I doubt this is the case now, since we’ve scheduled an interview. However, now more than ever before I feel like I need to proceed with caution and prepare extra well.

 The Tiosh Abaj Quandary
6/1/09
Keywords: tourism, gringos, Santiago
A few times over the last week, a fellow student and I have gone to a local gringo hotel called the Tiosh Abaj to do some schoolwork. While I’ve chalked this up to just getting out of the house to meet up (I can never work on schoolwork in my apartment in Raleigh), I heard my classmate on the phone today giving another, pretty interesting and surprisingly salient reason for why we go to Tiosh Abaj. “My friend Leah and I are about to head down to a gringo hotel to do some work, you know, so we don’t have to be ON for a few minutes”. In the westernized, tranquil and mostly empty Tiosh Abaj hotel environment, we don’t have to be culturally appropriate or watch what we say or say anything in Spanish. We can sit and read outside our rooms, and not worry about stares. Simply enough, we can be students and nothing more.

New Student in the House
6/1/09
Keywords: gringos, host family, transitions
A volunteer named R1 arrived today, she’s going to live here at the house with me and my host family while she works at the hospitalito for a month. She speaks English, which is nice and I’m kind of glad I’ll have someone in the house I can talk to from time to time. She’s here for a little less than a month and is talking about how long a time it’ll be, which makes me feel like I’m going to be here forever. I don’t mind, it’s just funny to see someone entering into the culture a week after I’ve gotten here and to notice the already apparent differences between our outlooks and perspectives.

Early Morning Santiago Costco
6/2/09
Keywords: tradition, market, Santiago
I was talking with L2 in the kitchen before dinner the day before yesterday, and we were discussing my class trip to Chichicastenango. As she stirred a pot of nixtamal, I remarked on how big the market was, and how different it appeared to be from the market in Santiago. I asked what the biggest market days here are, and L2 told me Sunday and Friday. She asked me if I had ever been there early in the morning. “How early?” I asked. L2 told me around 5 or 6 AM on Fridays and Sundays the market is transformed into a wholesale store for vendors and businesspeople all over the lake and beyond. They apparently come and get what they need, and go back to their towns to sell it in their markets or stores. I commented on what I had heard a classmate say about the market (or lack thereof) in Cerro de Oro, and L2 told me that yes, the Cerro de Oro merchants come and buy everything they need here in Santiago every week. I had no idea the market served a dual purpose like this. I wouldn’t be surprised if the wholesale component of the market comprised a great deal of Santiago’s economic viability.

Town Hall Meeting
6/2/09
Keywords: Politics, Santiago, host families
See also: Politics 5/27/09
Many times during the evenings I go and watch television with my host parents after we’ve eaten dinner. Last night I walked into the TV room and found the whole family vivaciously commenting on what appeared to be a shoddily recorded tape of some sort of local political referendum. I asked what was going on since all the dialogue was in Tz’utujil. My host father Don S1 and L1 explained that on Sunday afternoon there had been a particularly heated town hall meeting in which the mayor tried to fleece the population of Santiago into voting for a bill that would raise taxes for the 4^th time in the past month. Along with the tax increase the bill would make it harder for Santiago residents to get loans, and almost everyone except for the mayor was unequivocally opposed to the idea. As we watched the mayor speaking, Don S1 laughed at him and told me about how they had determined that the mayor was the only one in support of this law by calling the bank managers around town and seeing how they felt. One indigenous man had apparently stood up and yelled at the mayor, saying how he thought all the town people were ‘burros’ because they worked for a living instead of having a PhD. The crowd applauded, and when put to a vote the new bill was put to rest almost unanimously. Don S1 was very proud of the fact that he had gone and signed his name on the act to refute the bill, and L1 told me he goes to all the meetings he can although she doesn’t because they can get violent.

 El Horno
6/2/09
Keywords: Gringos, Food
The other day 2 classmates and I finally found the mythical El Horno. A cheery and immaculate burnt-orange and yellow bakery on the main street in Santiago, El Horno boasts an amazingly tempting case of homemade desserts (brownies, cookies, cakes and cheesecakes of all varieties) as well as offering coffee, tea, and soda. I had been craving chocolate since my arrival in Guatemala, and so especially savored my huge piece of chocolate/coconut/walnut cake as though it were to be my last. Earlier today I mentioned to L2 that we had gone there, and her immediate reaction was “ah, si, El Horno. Es bueno, porque el dueño es Americano.” I nodded, but then later realized that this was confusing. Are American-owned establishments inherently good? Maybe she was trying to cater to my home culture? The more I think about the statement the more it puts me off.

Lanchas

5/25/09

Keywords: transportation, cultural differences, Panajachel

Today 4 other students and I took the lancha across the lake from Santiago to Panajachel for the first time. It cost each of us 25Q, and because we got there before the boat filled up it took 40 minutes for us to actually leave. On the way back, a pilot approached us at the Pana dock and told us the price would be 50Q each because he drove a private boat. We argued with him for a long time and got him to reduce the price to 25Q, a favor he assured us was just for us ‘estudiantes’. Upon reaching the boat, we realized that it was a public lancha and that there were already 12 other locals there waiting to leave. We have also been told that there is a different pricing system based on whether or not the traveler is a local, a tourist, or somewhere in between.

Lanchas: Analysis, Literary Review Note

Keywords: transportation, cultural differences, analysis, lit. review, Panajachel

It is not so surprising to me that the lancha captains will charge different prices based on what demographic their passengers represent. It is, however, a little strange that the price hike (and the haggling that resulted from it) occurred in Panajachel instead of in Santiago given what I have read about Panajacheños’ attitude towards tourists. In Hinshaw’s article “Panajachel: A Tourist Town Amidst the Violence”, residents of Panajachel are described as having by and large adopted and accepted US tourists’ political and cultural views, and as being generally respectful towards tourists. Of course, this doesn’t mean that locals working in the tourism industry won’t try to make money off of unsuspecting gringos-that’s just good business. It just seems that through my experiences in Pana (granted, they are extremely limited) Hinshaw’s article may be a little off in terms of just how much Panajacheños adore tourists. Or maybe that he was correct in predicting that residents of Panajachel would start to realize that the system they live and work in isn’t ideal, or maybe I’m reading too much into my experience.

Getting Lost

5/25/09

Keywords: culture shock, Santiago

Although I made it to the docks successfully this morning, my other two unaccompanied forays into Santiago have both ended with my being lost and having to call either my family or another student. Yesterday I was trying to find an Internet café, and after wandering up and down the streets after taking a wrong turn I looked to my classmate to help me. It took 20 minutes of our combined efforts to help me get to the café. Today I asked a man on the street if he knew where my family lived after being lost for about 30 minutes. As I didn’t know my family’s surname, I just told the man the first names of my host parents. He gave me directions, and I arrived home within 2 minutes of asking for help.

Economic Disparity Between Host Families

5/25/09

Keywords: host families, Santiago, economy

Today in class students took turns describing their host family environment. Through more thorough conversation at lunch, it seems that there is a wide range of economic prosperity within the host family community. One student lives in a large house with her own bathroom adjacent to a built-on church and hotel, another bathes with a bucket of hot water heated over coals and lives in a house with no refrigerator or bathroom. I myself live in a 3-story house with a store attached to it.

Santiago vs. Panajachel re: Friendliness

5/25/09

Keywords: Santiago, Panajachel, cultural differences

I have noticed that most everyone in the streets in Santiago is very friendly, regardless of age or gender most stop and say ‘buenos dias’ or give some other greeting. In Panajachel, all interaction is on a business level.

Maximón

5/26/09

Keywords: Maya, Santiago, host families, tradition

I have not gone to see the local deity Maximón yet, but when I asked my family about him they replied immediately and abruptly that they didn’t know much about him because they are evangelical. They seemed to be very eager to change the subject. From what I know, Maximón is the product of a Catholic/Maya syncretic belief system.

Clothing Colors and Familial/Regional Ties

5/26/09

Keywords: Maya, tradition, cultural differences, Santiago

I have noticed that all of the women in Santiago wear traditional Maya traje, and most of the faldas/blusas here are in the same color range (mostly blues and purples). However, I have also noticed that groups of women will wear the same exact pattern on their blouse, and am wondering if women from the same family will wear the same pattern. I couldn’t figure out how to word my question correctly to my family, but will try again.

 

Talking about the War

5/26/09

Keywords: Maya, tradition, Santiago, Civil war

I have spoken to my host family twice regarding my reservations about studying the repercussions of the Guatemalan Civil War in terms of Mayan cultural representation, and my host mother and father seem to think I will be able to find many people to interview. They don’t seem to think my questions will offend people.

Dog on the Roof

5/26/09

Keywords: cultural differences, animals, culture shock

There is a dog that lives on our roof. I heard him barking the first night I was here, and then whimpering in the morning. My host sister told me today that someone had thrown the dog some poisoned meat to try and kill it. I asked if he was still alive, and my family told me yes.

Dog on the Roof

Journal Note

5/26/09

Keywords: cultural differences, culture shock, animals, journal note

I don’t know if it’s because I was tired today or just going through my first bouts of culture shock, but the situation with the dog on the roof has colored my day and made me really upset. I’m trying to keep motivated to finish my notes from today. Why would someone try to poison an animal like that? I understand the street dogs are mangy and neglected and that interacting with them is a bad idea, but what’s so bad about just leaving them alone? I’m worried the dog will die and I’ll have to help bring it down. I don’t think I can handle that.

Tz’utujil

5/26/09

Keywords: Maya, cultural differences, language, Santiago, host families

My host family has agreed to teach me as much Tz’utujil as possible before I go. They told me there was an Irish student a few years ago who learned the language passably in 2 months! My host sister has also agreed to translate any interviews in which the subject answers in Tz’utujil so that I have a broader range of source material.

Farming

5/26/09

Keywords: Maya, tradition, Santiago, host families

My host father goes to work on a milpa on the mountain across the narrow part of the lake from Santiago every morning. Upon asking him questions about what methods he uses to farm and what seeds he plants, it seems that the milpas here are very similar to the ones in the Yucatec Maya communities in Mexico. He explained in detail the cycle of planting but made no mention of a rain ceremony or any traditional Maya planting superstition. I believe this is because he is evangelical.

Children Roaming the Streets!

5/26/09

Keywords: Santiago, Maya, cultural differences

Children come running into the store at the front of my host family’s house every night and day without any adults accompanying them. Sometimes a child as young as 4 years old will come in alone and pick up toilet paper for their house or just to beg my host sister for candy.

Children Roaming the Streets!

Analysis Note

5/26/09

Keywords: Santiago, Maya, cultural differences, analysis

The levels of comfort parents have with letting their children run around in the streets and go to stores by themselves is directly linked to the trust people have in each other and in their community. In a place like Santiago where nobody has an address and everyone knows each other, I imagine social relationships within the community start at a very young age and have for a very long time. There is a marked difference in this regard between Santiago and Panajachel, where I have not seen any Guatemalan children walking along on their own.

 Panaderia

5/26/09

Keywords: Santiago, host families

Today I accompanied one of my host sisters to the bakery down the street to pick up bread for the store. There were at least 25 different kinds of bread to choose from, most of which I had never seen. They keep all the freshly baked bread in a very dark room, which is supposed to keep it fresher longer. We got enough to fill 2 large baskets, and go again tomorrow to get more.

Politics

5/27/09

Keywords: host families, Santiago, politics, economy

During a break in our discussion of the civil war, I asked L1 and L2 what they thought about President Colom. Both of them disapprove wholeheartedly of his administration as they feel he misrepresents himself as an advocate of the indigenous people. L1 told me he only represents some indigenous people, mostly the ‘quien no trabajan’. L1 and L2 expressed sentiments judging the unfairness of Colom’s welfare policies since they feel they and their family work hard every day and deserve as much help as those who don’t work. L1 told me taxes have gone up 3 times in the past few months, the most recent increase having been in the last week. I asked if they liked Molina better, and L2 told me they prefer his ‘militante’ methods of bringing criminals to justice and of reducing crime. I asked if Molina’s militaristic stance made people uncomfortable and L1 responded that yes, he reminds them and many others in Santiago of the civil war and that realistically they don’t like either Colom or Molina. L2 told me she would vote for the 3^rd ‘universitario’ candidate, but that they always lose. I told her I feel the same way about American elections and the 2 party system.

Municipal Police in Santiago

5/27/09

Keywords: Police, Santiago

L1 told me that on Sunday the 24^th when she tried to come pick me up at the dock she had an encounter with the municipal police, who she says are her ‘least favorite’ people. Around 9:45 AM L1 took a tuktuk down to the dock to meet me, and on the way the piloto had to ask permission to pass by a municipal police truck on a street nearby the lake. The police granted permission, and L1 commented to the piloto that it was strange for him to ask permission to pass since it was none of the police’s business. The piloto replied that it was best to appease the police so there wouldn’t be any problems, and with that the 2 of them continued on to the dock. After realizing I wasn’t there (I had continued on with L1’s aunt, M2 in a pickup truck up to the house) L1 told the piloto to take her home. As soon as they started moving, the tuktuk was stopped by the same truck full of municipal police that had let them through a few minutes before. Upon asking why they were stopped, the police told the piloto and L1 that only certain tuktuks were allowed by the dock and that they were in violation of the law because they had no cargo to drop off or to pick up but were down by the dock anyways. L1 explained the situation to the police regarding our miscommunication with one another, and noticed that the police were writing down the license plate number of the tuktuk. Enraged, the piloto started calling all of the police officers ‘jodiendo hijos de puta’ and demanding they leave. The police took the license plate number, told L1 and the piloto they’d be fined, and left. L1 tells me there is a program on the radio every Friday (‘muy chistoso’, ‘me encanta’ she says) during which different public officials receive unedited questions and missives from anonymous callers from around Santiago. The mayor is slated as the guest this Friday, and L1 tells me I should be around for when she calls to tell him exactly what she thinks of regulating which tuktuks can drive down to the dock.

Eclipse!

5/27/09

Keywords: animals, Santiago, dog on the roof

10:35 PM: Approximately 10 minutes ago I heard an uproarious scuffling on the roof directly above my head. It sounded like paws, and I thought maybe another (unpoisoned) dog was running around up there. A minute later, I heard panting and looked up from my reading to see a thunderous black mass of dog rocketing past my bedroom door down the stairs to the main courtyard of my host family’s house. “Quien es esto?!” I said as I ran out to ascertain the identity of our canine intruder. “Eclipse!” said my host father, closely echoed by L1, L2 and M1. I asked if he was the poisoned dog, and sure enough he is! He’s doing much better now, as is evidenced by the speed in which he takes laps around the courtyard taking care to knock everything down that dares to stand in his way. My host father told me that Eclipse has lived on the roof since he was a puppy, and that he’s fed every day and is healthy so he’s okay to pet. He came to live with my host family because of a broken paw he had when he was a few months old, M1 helped fix it and ever since then he’s been the ‘perro de techo’. I am guessing because our roof dog is as big as the side of a barn, the poisoned meat did little to harm him. The perpetrators will have to try much harder next time if they want to eclipse Eclipse.

Animal Control

5/27/09

Keywords: animals, Santiago, dog on the roof

L2 told me just now the mayor sanctions the poisoning of dogs.

Layout-The Sojuel house is situated on the corner of a hilly residential street about ¼ mile from the dock letting out onto the narrow end of Lake Atitlan. Directly facing a volcano (San Pedro, I believe), the house is comprised of 2 main stories and a roof used for drying laundry. The main floor is comprised of a small convenience store facing the street, a TV room and pantry directly behind it, and a small courtyard that leads to the adjacent kitchen and bathroom. There is another house directly connected to the Sojuel’s by a staircase behind the courtyard, but the homes are separated by a large lime tree that grows in the center of the courtyard area. Up the courtyard stairs, there is a U-shaped 2^nd floor comprised of 3 tiled bedrooms and a balcony overlooking the lake. Another staircase outside the 3^rd bedroom door and across the hall from the main staircase landing leads up to the roof, which is separate from that of the next house over.

Furniture-The furniture in the house is sparse as a result of the lack of common space, and all the chairs are plastic save for 3 tiny (1 foot high) rickety and seemingly ancient wooden stools that look like they were made for children but which serve as stepstools for the person working in the store and also as doorstops. There are 2 stacks of brightly colored plastic stools with plastic mesh seats, one stack in the kitchen and the other in the store for visitors. The stools each measure about 2 and ½ feet tall and about 1 foot across and are made of shiny plastic in red, blue, yellow, green and orange. There are 2 plastic desk chairs made of dull navy blue plastic which measure about 4 feet tall and have slatted backs, one in my room at a wooden school desk and one in the store behind a sewing machine table with the same finish as the school desk in my room. There are 3 1 and ½ foot by 1 and ½ foot light wood bedside tables, one in each of the 3 bedrooms. The kitchen table is also wooden and measures approximately 4ft by 3ft, 4 people could sit at it if it weren’t against a wall. The only other furniture item is a small TV stand which I think may be the same as the nightstands.

Appliances-There is an ominous electric showerhead in the bathroom with wires protruding from it and running to a hole in the wall. Every time someone changes the hot water setting (there are three: cold, warm, and hot) sparks fly out of the top of the showerhead threatening the lives of the operator and the appliance in one fell swoop. The only appliances in the kitchen are a wood-burning stove made out of brick and topped with aluminum, a huge aluminum sink and also a yellow electric oven and range with many dents in it. There are 2 refrigerators in the store, one of which is the same color yellow as the range/stove in the kitchen and which houses ice cream and soda for sale. The other refrigerator is well over 8 feet tall and 4 feet wide and contains more soda, as well as the family’s refrigerated food items such as meat and dairy products. There is one television, which I think measures about 15 inches in diameter.

Bathroom-The bathroom is off the main courtyard and separated from it by a wrought iron door. The room itself is very small, probably 5x5 ft total and outfitted with a sink, a small mirror and a shower. The shower curtain has a blue and orange flower pattern on it, the same pattern as the curtain that separates the store from the rest of the house. Under the small plastic-framed mirror, there is a soap dish where all the family’s toothbrushes sit. They are colored brightly, in the same cacophonous plastic tones as the stools in the kitchen and the store. There appears to be a window through the concrete wall inside the shower, but it has been covered with a brightly patterned floral oilcloth. Regardless of what goes on inside the bathroom, it always smells strongly of some minty sort of house cleaner.

Store-the store is the first thing anyone approaching the house sees, and takes up a third of the first floor of the building. Bread, school supplies and medicines/soaps/shampoos are all displayed in 3 separate glass cases, with a myriad of other products on shelves behind the cases. The inventory is comprised of bread, school supplies, snacks such as chips and candy and cookies, ice cream, telephone cards, shampoo, soap, hair dye, diapers, soda, water, soup, canned goods, thread, jewelry, medicine, toilet paper and other groceries-all in a space that probably measures around 15x15ft. In the corner of the store there is a sewing machine and treadle that the 2 elder sisters in the Sojuel family use, with a table alongside for brilliantly colored thread whose spindles match up to the ones I have seen in the Santiago market. Most of the colors are different shades of purple and blue, which seem to be the colors most of the women wear in the town. There are a few Audubon guides and other books about flowers and plants along with the thread, which are used as examples for the intricate embroidery that is usually sitting, unfinished, on top of the sewing machine. There are always children running in and out of the store laughing and asking mostly for candy or toys or ice cream, and there are also many people who come in solely to talk to Lolita or Cholita and it seems that the store affords just as much social opportunity as it does financial advantage.

Balcony-At the end of the hallway on the 2^nd floor there is a wrought-iron door much like the one that leads to the bathroom. Outside of it there is a balcony, probably only 2 feet wide but boasting an incomparable view of the Santiago side of Lake Atitlan. As Santiago is one of the only villages around the lake that has permanent fishermen, the view includes the brightly colored dots of men fishing in canoes as well as a sizeable hunk of the Santiago roofline that is comprised of lots of corrugated tin and stucco or concrete at varying heights. On top of the roofs are the roosters that I hear crowing all night, as well as dogs and a number of objects such as brightly colored plastic buckets and baskets that people throw up onto the roof either for storage or to get them out of the way. From the balcony it is also possible to see the patchwork of fallow or recently seeded milpas across the lake on the side of San Pedro volcano where most of the men in the village (including my host father) go to work during the days. It is amazing how uniform and pretty the squares of different greens look from far away. There is always either fog or the threat of more of it, and its rolling gray blanket is difficult to distinguish from the smoke of small fires on the side of the mountain save for the directions in which each travel.

Smells-The smells from my house are comprised mostly of smoke, ripe fruit, cooking food, laundry detergent and the specific smell of the breeze coming off the lake. The lake air smells almost salty, maybe it’s the fish? Smoke is the most easily distinguished odor, although it isn’t as acrid as it could be and seems to be comprised of plants burning more than anything. Often rain is another dominant smell, although it smells different rising up off of cobbled stone than it does rising off of asphalt and tends to mingle towards the end of a storm with the smell of excrement as it washes down the callejons towards the lake. Because of the house’s proximity to a bakery I can often smell freshly baked bread, and in the mornings the smell of baking is so powerful I have little trouble getting out of bed. As smell memory is especially poignant, the perfume I brought with me reminds me most of home and helps me feel more comfortable. It is interesting to smell something I associate with Raleigh in this context, but it’s helping me through the transition of arriving here and living somewhere new.

Colors-When thinking of colors here it is impossible not to start with the lake. In the mornings and evenings the water is icy blue, and I haven’t seen much of the sunrise or sunset reflected on the surface yet but I have seen the rosiness at twilight diffused through the fog around the volcano turning everything pink. In the afternoons the water is darker, sometimes teal and sometimes a deep hue bordering on navy. In terms of the village, all the women dress in deep shades of purple and red with designs embroidered on their huipiles and blouses in every color in the rainbow. The houses are mostly shades of rust, tan and concrete but from above you can see that many of the walls are painted raucous shades of green, blue and yellow. The brightness of the clothes and the houses as well as of all the bright vegetables and fruits at the market seem to be in direct competition with the magnificence of the lake, and at this point the contest is too close to call.

Plants-Apart from the corn and coffee plants, many of the forests and plants look similar to what I’ve seen in America, especially in Florida and other places throughout the south. The corn grows remarkably tall though, the larger of the stalks look to be almost 10 feet high! The abundance of the plant life here is the biggest difference, it seems like everywhere that isn’t covered with water or houses is bursting at the seams with shoots and flowers and leaves. It is as if the mountain is trying to restore itself by tacking down lush green wallpaper wherever it finds a spare inch.

Lights-Most of the lights here are fluorescent rings, in the house there is one per room. Much of the ambient light that floods the courtyard comes either from other houses or from businesses closer to the lake. In town as far as I can tell the only lights are those from other houses and also the stadium lights down by the dock. Lightning is also a staple. My favorite things to see at night are the lights from one of the mountain towns (maybe Santa Cruz?) twinkling in the distance over the water like stars and then slowly petering out. If you strain your eyes you can also see amber lights from the hotels reflecting off the water.

TA-DA!


view from the dock towards the Volcan Atitlán






view of Santiago from the boat! I live here


 

This morning the different groups of students were sorted by homestay destination and quickly dispatched across the lake to meet their families. Mine was the very first group, it was interesting to note that the people running the lanchas are exclusively Mayan.

Santiago is gorgeous, and much bigger than I expected. And my family is fantastic so far, for which I am INCREDIBLY grateful. Doña Marcela/Mercedes and Don Salvador don’t speak too much English, and I’m really happy for it because hopefully I can learn some Tz’ut’ujil! It’s amazing how similar it sounds to Yucatec, the pronunciation and a lot of the verb conjugations are exactly the same. I’d be interested to study the linguistic origins of both languages, as I’m sure they came from a common ancestor. It blows my mind that Yucatec and Tz’ut’ujil are only 2 out of 31 Maya languages.

There is a small store in the front of my family’s house where the eldest daughter Lolita (around 45 years old, I think) works. They sell EVERYTHING. This is so different from the US, where everything has a specialty store.

I think Lolita will be my best ally and friend within the family, she’s taking me under her wing already! I asked if I could help her in the store, and she told me I could but only after I come up with a suitable topic for my project. Tim and Carla weren’t kidding when they said our families would push us to get our work done.

My family is evangelical, I went to church with them tonight. There was a lot of clapping, and a lot of standing but I was really happy I went. I want to find out when and how evangelical Christianity spread to communities like this one, I was under the impression that most Mayan communities either practiced Catholicism or some syncretic religion but I guess not! Apparently church will be 2 times a week.

The church service was in a baffling mix of Spanish and Tz’ut’ujil, even when the congregation stood up to read Bible verses everyone knew when to use Mayan and when to use Spanish! It must be from practice, I can’t think of any other reason for the exact same mix of languages other than maybe a tendency to replace certain words in Spanish with ones in Tz’ut’ujil.

I’m not sure how much time to spend around my host family, I ask every time there’s an opportunity if anyone needs help cleaning or cooking but I feel like I’m in the way mostly. Everyone is really eager to talk to me, just not when they’re doing chores so I hope that over the next week or so the family starts letting me help out. I’d hate to live here for 7 weeks and be waited on, but I’m sure that’s not the way it’ll be. I need to remember it’s my first day here and just let things happen.

Lolita says that people will most likely be EAGER to talk to me about the civil war, so long as I do it in a friendly way and make sure to talk to people when I meet them on the street or in passing instead of making appointments. She said no one will come to appointments and she doesn’t know why, I imagine it’s either because sitting down with someone and being interviewed is a nuisance or it’s just not a priority to talk with someone they don’t know or trust. Either way, her advice is encouraging.

I lost my damned digital voice recorder. Will they sell some kind of replacement anywhere near here?

Lolita apparently used to have a husband, I can’t work out exactly what she said because I think she was being purposely vague but it had something to do with him getting too sick to live with her anymore and having to go to the hospital. I’m happy she felt comfortable telling me that, I wonder how attached these families get to us students or if they do at all really?

The youngest sister of the family told me that people keep yelling ‘kanche’ or ‘kanchi’ at me, which means ‘blondie’. Apparently I was also offered a free cab ride, which I hope persists because it’ll save me lots of money.

I’ve been noticing no one has any qualms about calling me out on being on the chubbier side, it would have offended me a few years ago to hear that falls won’t affect me because I have ‘bien carne’, but now I’m (more) able to put comments like that in the context of the culture I’m in.

The youngest daughter in my family left this morning to go to work in Guatemala City, from what I gather she only comes home once a month. She’s been at her job for 9 years and she’s only 25, I wonder if I can find out more about how the educational system/moving on to full time employment works here.

Related to the last item, Lolita told me that a lot of times evangelical church rules prevent women from getting as much education as men in Santiago. Need to find out what these rules are.

Saturday, May 22

~11AM- took a trip to ruins of Iximche (“corn tree” in Mayan). It’s amazing to me that there are enough similarities between Yucatec and Ch’olti that some of the words are the same as I learned last summer.

Rode in a series of program-segregated vans, social workers in white and anthropologists in gray. Surreal experiences included: rolling through Tecpan (poorest village we’ve seen so far and reminiscent of last year’s experience apart from setting) listening to 50 Cent and assorted other popular rap; I almost felt embarrassed, although I’m not sure why since the Guatemalan driver put the music on himself.

It’s a little jarring to see a lot of people walking down the side of a 4 lane highway, some with small children and others with animals. In many cases, it seemed like there were farms or workplaces right off the main road, with no exits or signs advertising them.

At Iximche, noted the similarities between the site and Puuc route sites visited in 08

Alongside the archaeological site proper is a contemporary Maya temple, a hmen or shaman woman of some kind was there praying with 3 men over a fire and a number of 2-liter bottles of soda. I thought the anachronism of the soda alongside a ritual that probably has roots hundreds of years old was interesting, someone in the van gave a reason for the soda’s presence but I forget what it was. Linda commented that the ceremony must have been for a very serious reason, as 2 chickens were sacrificed guillotine-style over the fire. People took photos, I thought it was disrespectful so I refrained. It was kind of weird to think about the fact that the ceremony was so serious, and yet a bunch of white kids were able to go in with cameras and document it; the shaman and the 3 men could have been praying for a loved one on the brink of death. I wonder how Americans would feel if a bunch of people burst into candelight vigils for their loved ones with shutters a-clicking?

Cows and horses seem to be tied up in the strangest places, including tiny hillocks just off the side of the highway and in the middle of archaeological sites. I’m not complaining, I think my love for the peccaries last summer has broadened to include cows, horses and sheep.

Had lunch at a hotel right outside of Tecpan/Iximche, Tim told a story regarding President Bush’s visit to the same hotel for lunch and the extensive shamanistic cleansing ritual that ensued after his departure. We were promised exotic animals, but there were just more sheep and cows.

On the trip up the mountain from Tecpan, around 3 PM-it was raining when we left the restaurant, and although the rain has stopped there’s still a blanket of heavy fog over everything. In the 5 feet I can see ahead of the van, I notice people in increasingly traditional dress working increasingly hard on the side of the road. There are lots of baskets on heads and bundles on backs. I feel like the rap blaring in the van doesn’t fit the situation, but when I put my iPod on I just start to think about how nervous I am about all this and am inspired to listen to all the songs I can find that give me goosebumps. What am I getting myself into?

I am amazed at the verticality of many of the farming fields on our way to Panajachel-how does that work? There aren’t any terraces as far as I can tell.

The drive through Sololá was crazy, the steepest city streets I’ve ever seen bordering what would turn out to be the lake; although from our van, all we could see is fog. The verticality of the villages is amazing, with houses and businesses rising up out of the landscape in rows that seem haphazard until I notice their strategic position among the hills and folds of the mountains.

Panajachel seems like kind of an anomaly given the civil war’s history around this lake-in our article for class on Monday I read that Pana has always (for the most part) escaped violence and entanglement in political situations due to its appeal as a tourist destination. It strikes me as odd that there is a pocket of sincere capitalist interest and conservative political mindset right across the lake from Santiago Atitlán and its legacy of 300 missing citizens during the war.

The lake is the most beautiful place I’ve ever seen, and as nice as the hotel is in Pana I’m anxious to get to my homestay and meet my family. I realized I know nothing about them, only a little about the town they live in and the politics surrounding it. I wonder if it’s feasible to study the effects of civil war/topography on culture, or if it’s even relevant? I don’t want to get too ahead of myself with my brainstorming if I’ll just end up needing to change topics. However, it seems like a waste of time not to at least get started working things out! I guess it really does depend on what Tim says and also on whether or not people will actually talk to me about the war. I’m counting on the older people in the community for some solid data.

Went out tonight (Saturday, May 22) with 2 other students from anthro-Amy and Megan. Both of them were incredibly helpful as they are both anthropology graduate students and had a lot of advice as to how I should start my field notes/shape my research. It was also nice to have a few beers, as I know that’s not really too much of an option while we’re at our homestays. At this point I am more nervous about meeting my family than I even thought possible. I have no idea how this sort of thing works.

Wednesday, May 20-Friday, May 21

Conflicting opinions in Guatemala City as to the severity/repercussions of political uneasiness; Summer said someone on her plane into GUA told her to treat the most recent events as an almost constant occurrence-according to him, it just so happens that international reporters actually chose to report about the Rosenberg situation.

Lots of graffiti on the way into main downtown, ‘Antonio Arbenz es el soldado de la gente’ and lots of pleas to free a political prisoner called Romiro Choc-not sure who he is. Also lots of anarchy signs/anti-US sentiments present, although could be due to graffiti’s presence near universities as everyone’s been very polite and kind. EXCEPT

Thursday while Summer and I were crossing the street into the Plaza Mayor in downtown Guatemala City, a young man mocked us by screaming ‘oh my God’ in a typical American valley girl accent. It would have been funny, if not for the look of disgust on his face and the knowledge Summer and I already have about the political situation in Guatemala and what the US has done to influence it.

Found a bookstore and a heavy metal bar right next to each other on a side street in Guatemala City, asked the attendant (in the bookstore, not the bar) for a tourist map and ended up with 3 books on the civil war. I was a little surprised that the bookstore worker didn’t seem taken aback at all by the idea of a gringa researching the conflict-maybe this bodes well for my research prospects in the village?

The cabbie who took us into town seemed very apprehensive about us going into the heart of the city and told us to ‘ten cuidado’ about 6 times before stopping the cab to let us out in front of the cathedral in the Plaza.

Stopped in a café to read and have a beer (Gallo), ended up sharing some newspapers we found in a recycling bin. Rosenberg incident, Obama present on almost every page. Editorial page was interesting in its variety of opinion, I tried to associate each editorial letter with the type of person I imagine it came from but then realized things are a lot more complicated than they seem here. I need to do more reading, new books should be good for that.

First sign of real poverty here, Friday afternoon in a neighborhood that Tim described as upper middle class there was a little boy squatting to shit in the road-it looked like he had been sick, and his mother was begging on the side of the street a few feet away from him. The stark contrast between the neighborhood and the people begging in it was jarring, but also befitting of the vast class differences present in Guatemalan society since…well, the conquest, but indicative more recently of the long hard road away from corruption and civil war. Reminded me of last summer again.

All the reminders of the Sum2008 program in Yucatán reinforce the idea that maybe my project here should have something to do with comparing and contrasting the two disparate experiences in some way (spec. in regards to Mayan cultural experiences, etc.). I just need to find the criteria with/context in which to do this.